New Beginnings
by BlueOceana
Summary: Cloud Strife, the savior of Gaia has started a new life in Radiant Garden. Plagued by the past and demons that he just can't seem to vanquish, Cloud is starting to reach his emotional breaking point. Can Leon, another seasoned fighter help Cloud overcome his past and learn to love again?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello, this is my first Kingdom Hearts story, so please leave comments. I will also welcome new ideas. The characters also belong to their creators, I don't own them!**

* * *

Sitting at his usual seat at the table Leon tried to block out Yuffie's constant chattering and Cid's curses as he tried, with little luck so far, to fix a virus that's on his laptop. He then decided to go over a check list of things that needed to be done for the day, until he heard somebody calling his name. Looking up Leon saw that it was Aerith. He then proceeded to look at her to let her know she had his attention, when she was satisfied, that she indeed did have it, she then sweetly asked "Can you go wake up Cloud for me, his food is almost done." Leon answered her with the customary nod of his head, but decided to leave out his signature, "Whatever." Because, lets face it, nobody could ever be mean to Aerith. Leon then proceeded up the stairs to go wake Cloud up.

When Leon got to Cloud's room he knocked on the door, when he still didn't get an answer after the first couple tries, he then knew that Cloud was not going to make things easy for him, and he was going to have to go in and wake him personally. Inhaling a big breath of air, Leon slowly exhaled it though his nose, trying to prolong the usual headache, and keep his temper in check. _"What a pain in the ass." _exasperatedly thought, while hurrying up and doing what he came up there for.

When he entered Cloud's room Leon decided to take the chance to examine his surroundings, it was the first time he has ever been in Cloud's room after all. The first thing that Leon took notice of was a huge sword, a different one then what Cloud would normally use. It was mounted on the wall and Leon could tell that Cloud really cherished it. He could tell, because of how good of shape it was in, from what he could see there was not a blemish to be found on it. He then noticed that the walls were a sky blue and the carpet was white, the colors coincidentally suiting the angelic blond. Moving on to the furniture, he noted that it consisted of a simple dresser and mirror, a queen size bed, a book case, and night stand with a lamp, and... a photo? _"Well that's weird, Strife doesn't seem like the type to take photos."_ curiously thought.

Letting his curiosity get the better of him, Leon checked to be sure that Cloud was still asleep, when he came to the conclusion that he indeed was, Leon hurriedly picked up the photo to get a better look. In the photo was a younger looking Cloud, he had to be about about fifteen. You could tell he was still ignorant to the ways of the world by the innocent look in his eyes. They looked so and determined, ready to take anything life could throw at him, so different from the haunted look they always seemed to have now. The thought confused Leon, making him wonder what could have changed.

Next to him was an older man, about the age nineteen to twenty. He had long spiky black hair that fell just past his shoulders, a muscular build, tan skin, vibrant violet eyes, and a X shaped scar on his right cheek. He had an arm around Cloud's shoulders and a big grin on his face, you could really tell he was having a good time. It looked like a normal picture, but the weird thing about it was that Cloud was also enjoying himself, if the big toothy smile that was adorning his face was any thing to go by. All of a sudden Leon started to feel real irritated, irritated that he has never seen Cloud smile before. Hell, the closest he has ever seen was that cocky grin he would rarely see adorning his face at someone's expense. Hurriedly putting the photo back in place, Leon decided to hurry up and do what he came in here for. Leon then proceeded to go shake Cloud on the shoulder.

* * *

_They were in a back of a truck, the blistering sun was beating down on them making it seem as if they were in Hell. Well, they may as already be there, those four years under that mad mans reign make any Hell seem like a paradise. All the experiments done on Zack and himself, do they even qualify as human any more? God he was already enough of an outcast, how will anybody except him now, a monster? He has no one, no one except Zack! His mother, killed right in front of him, and he was powerless to stop it! His home town, if could even be called that, burned to the ground! Nothing but a pile of ash and bad memories, another thing he failed at!. God he should just- " Come on Spikey, look at me, stop brooding." _

_I slowly brought my eyes to Zack's face, his handsome face. I could look at him all day. Zack tenderly brought his hand up to caress my cheek, his eyes meeting mine, showing me love and adoration. "Everything is going to be ok Cloud, we are going to make it though this, and when we do we'll buy a house out in the country. Maybe adopt a few kids. Just think about it, it'ell be everything we could dream of!." I slowly placed my hand atop of his, hoping that my eyes are conveying my mirrored feelings. "Zack, words can't even describe how much I love you, you mean everything to me." He suddenly broke out in to a big grin "Right back at ya Chocobo." _

_Suddenly he grabbed my wrist and pulled me atop of him, so my legs were straddling his lean waist. He then put one hand around my hips, pulling me to him, crushing our chests together. The other behind my head, clutching my blond spikes. He then pulled my head towards him crashing his lips on to mine, sucking my bottom lip between his teeth. After he got done sucking and licking my lips, he slowly deepened the kiss, letting his tong explore my waiting mouth. Playing my body like a fine tuned instrument, one only he knew how to play. Knowing exactly how to drive me crazy and make me moan his favorite tune. Making the experience magical for both of us. _

_The kiss was so needy, so passionate that I felt that with the combined heat from the hot summer sun that I might just melt. We fought each other for dominance over the kiss, our tongues doing a dance that only we knew. I then slowly let him take control, the burning flame slowly turning to a slow ember. __Then all too soon the need for air became too much and we abruptly broke apart, gasping for air, leaving a thin trail of saliva connecting our swollen lips. We just sat there like that, my head resting on his for what seemed like eternity, a blush adorning both our faces. When the passion began to fade away I slowly slid off his lap next to him, laying my head on his shoulder, he then put his arm around my waist, holding me to him. "Go on and take a nap Spike, I'll wake you when we get there."_

_I stared in his eyes for a few seconds, before I brought my lips to his for one more kiss. This one was so unlike the other, so chaste, so pure, but passionate all the same. The thought of having to live with out this man, this passionate man who can light up a room with his very presence was too much. The thought seemed so alien that my brain could not even conceive a future without him. "Ok, Zack." I then rested my head back on his shoulder, letting my conscious fade away in to the abyss known and sleep, but I could not shake the feeling in the back of my mind that something horribly wrong was going to happen. Too bad my __instincts were usually spot on._

* * *

Cloud woke to a harsh shake to his shoulder and a gruff voice saying his name. Opening his eyes he saw the handsomely scarred face of Squall Leonheart, or better known as Leon. "Come on Strife, get up we got a big day ahead of us." Rolling his eyes and swinging his legs over the side of the bed Cloud proceeded to go about his morning ritual, until he noticed that Leon was still standing there.

He appeared to be lost in thought, so Cloud decided to see if he could embarrass him for once. "Well, are you going to stand there and watch me strip Leonheart?", Leon's eyes suddenly got wide and he started to blush a little, he then proceeded to angrily walk out he door. But before he was fully out of the room he turned his head around and said "Hurry up, Aerith is waiting on you", he then left closing the door with a slam.

Once he was finally alone, Cloud started to unbutton his shirt, letting it slowly fall to the floor, exposing his pale skin. He then turned around to examine himself in the mirror, taking extra time to look at his right arm, the one with the hideous black scab marring the porcelain skin, the Geostigma._ "Yet another imperfection, another thing to set me apart from everybody else, not that anybody knows its there."_ Cloud morbidly thought. He probably doesn't have much longer left anyway, if he doesn't hurry up and find Sephiroth. But he just couldn't bring himself to care anymore, about anything really, except Aerith, but she was different, an anomaly in his usual countenance.

Once he was finally dressed Cloud took a minute to look at a photo of Zack and himself. _"We looked so happy, heck, I was even smiling. I never smile, well not anymore anyway, there's not a reason to, Zack's not here to make me anymore."_ Once he was fully dressed and done reminiscing, Cloud gave the photo one last longing glance from over is shoulder. He then continued on his way to the kitchen to get a start on another repetitive day, a day without Zack. But in the back of his mind Cloud could not get the image of a blushing Leon out of his head and how the reddened tone looked so sexy on his lovely tanned skin.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello, this is my first Kingdom Hearts story, so please leave comments. I will also welcome new ideas. The characters also belong to their creators, I don't own them!**

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After slamming Cloud's door, Leon hurried back to the kitchen, the bright red blush still adorning his face. When he reached the entrance, he took a minute to compose himself. _"God, I can't believe I was blushing like a school girl, Squall Leonheart does not blush! A__nd because of Strife no less!__"_ Leon grudgingly thought, while embarrassingly covering his mouth with his hand. He then took a minute to repeat a calming mantra to calm his nerves.

After deciding that he was calm enough, Leon then reclaimed his seat at the table, deciding to taking a minute to think about the brooding blond. There was not a lot Leon knew about Cloud, he knew that he came from the same world as Aerith, Yuffie, and Cid, and that they all traveled together before, but not much else. He never really took the time to listen when the others talked about their home, he never felt he need to. He also knew that he was even more solitary than himself, and that he keeps everybody but Aerith at arms length.

Aerith, now Leon didn't really know much about their relationship, but it seemed that she had Cloud wrapped around her little finger. Hell, he even went out of his way to help her. If she was carrying bags, he rushed to relieve her of her burden, if she need help in the garden, he was there. And the way he acts around her, he treats her with the most gentleness he has ever seen him treat anything. Even an idiot could tell he cares about her, maybe even too much for them to be considered mere friends.

All of a sudden Leon got a painful feeling in his gut from the mere thought of Cloud and Aerith being lovers. He didn't love Aerith, no more than a sister anyway. Now Cloud, just the thought of what the blond swordsman said back in his room still brought a blush to Leon's face. He could still hear his voice, _"Well, are you just going to stand there and watch me strip Leonheart?"_ God it sounded so seductive. And the way his blue eyes always have that unearthly shine to them, that just further enhanced his angelic features; the golden blond hair, pale pink lips, pale porcelain skin, and that thin waist that continued on to his feminine hips. A waist that any woman would envy, and no man should have. God, he could bet that even his nipples were that same pale pink- and Leon's train of thought abruptly stopped there. _"No, I was not just fantasizing about Cloud Strife!" _Leon thought determinedly. Heck, he wan't even gay, but he did have to give it to the man. He was one of the most beautiful people Leon has ever seen, and that's even after all the worlds he has been to. Leon was brought out of his musings by a loud clatter of a chair hitting the floor, he looked up just in time to see Yuffie giving Cloud a bone crushing hug.

* * *

Entering the kitchen Cloud was greeted with the usual "Mornin' Spikey" from Cid and Yuffie, though the later added in a quick glomp before he was able to dodge the situation. Cloud then proceeded to awkwardly pat Yuffie on the back and mutter a quick greeting in return, before taking his seat at the table. Even though he should be used to the way Yuffie showed her affection, he still just could not get used to it. The only one he was even remotely ok with touching him was Aerith, but he would do anything for her. He did owe it to her after all, she made the ultimate sacrifice by giving up her life to save the planet from Meteor and Jenova.

He could still remember the gruesome image of Sephiroth impaling her though the back with Masamune, her last words to him. That even though their relationship didn't work out the way they thought it would, that she will always love him, and for him to try to move on. Her giving him one last kiss, leaving a trail of blood, where her now pale hand had just lovingly caressed his cheek, never to do so again. He remembered just sitting there, holding her pale lifeless body for what seemed like eternity, till Tifa pried him away from her. He still remembered them laying her body to rest at the lake, them putting her in a frilly white dress that made her seem even more angelic then usual. They left her hair down, letting it fall down to her knees in bountiful curls. They adorned her head with her favorite yellow flowers, the ones she put her heart and soul in to growing. Them all saying loving words of how much they would miss her, himself crying for the first time since Zack died. He remembered it all, every little detail. He still couldn't forgive himself for- Cloud was brought out of his musings by a pale hand lovingly caressing his cheek.

Looking up he saw that it was Aerith, she was looking at him with her knowing green eyes. "Are you ok Cloud?" He then put his hand atop hers and mumbled a quick "Yeah I'm fine", while giving her hand a quick caress before doping it back in his lap. She just continued to look at him though, not believing him. "Well if you want to talk about it you know I'm here" he responded with a quiet "I know" before lowering his eyes back to the table. She then put his food in front of him while mumbling about how he needed eat to more and how he was starting to loose weight.

After thinking about how he felt loosing Aerith the first time, Cloud decided he needed to let her know he was glad to have her back, and that though they weren't dating anymore he still loved her. "Hey Aerith", stopping what she was doing Aerith looked up to see Cloud looking at her. "What is it Cloud" looking her in the eyes for a minute, he then told her "I'm just glad your here." She responded with a big smile and a cheerful "Me too" before going back to what she was doing. Cloud then started to gratefully eat the food she provided.

* * *

Leon watched the interactions between Cloud and Aerith with a critical eye. They just further proved his suspicions that there was indeed more between them then them just being friends, but he also felt there is something he was missing about the situation as a whole. A missing piece to the puzzle known as Cloud Strife. But it still didn't explain why the thought of Cloud being in a relationship with somebody bothered him the way it did, there is no reason it should. And how Cloud saying a simple sentence could make Aerith so damn happy. Hell, Aerith should definitely know that everybody was thankful to have her around. She did a lot for everybody and even he would admit that there were times that he just wouldn't know what to do if it weren't for her.

Leon then took a minute to think about the time he was dating Riona, the thought of her talking to Seifer used to never really bother him. Yeah, he didn't like it, but he never really tried to stop her either. He ended up breaking up with her anyway, she just started wanting more from him then he was willing to give. Wanting him to change for her, to get married and have kids. He just couldn't see himself doing any of those with her. Now, don't get him wrong he doesn't dislike children, he just can't see himself raising them with her. Or having them in general, it was the only thing that they really fought about. He still felt bad about it, just dumping her after all they have been though, but he knew she would be happier in the long run anyway. Besides last he heard she was getting married to some guy he couldn't remember the name of.

Deciding he pondered enough of the subject, Leon decided to get everybody started on what needed to be done for the day. After getting everybody's attention he went though the process of assigning everybody a task; Aerith and Yuffie were going shopping for supplies, Cid was going to continue working on his laptop, just because he would be insufferable until he fixed the damn thing, and Cloud and himself were going to fix the waterway. Apparently there was a blockage in one of the pipes, he could work on solving the mysteries of Cloud Strife later, but right now he had a job to do.

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**Thanks for reading! If anybody has any ideas for the next chapter let me know. Because, lets face it, I have no idea about anything to do with pluming. LOL**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello, this is my first Kingdom Hearts story, so please leave comments. I will also welcome new ideas. The characters also belong to their creators, I don't own them!**

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The day was nice, the sun was shinning and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. Definitely a good day to have to get wet, too bad he couldn't take off his shirt, Cloud thought. When Leon and himself got to the water way they went right to work finding out what was blocking the water flow. Turned out it was some type of build up stuck in there, so they got in there and started to try to loosen it up. Leon had his shirt off and Cloud could not help but take notice of his nice physique; his strong arms that flowed into a well muscled chest and abs, a six pack. Strong hip bones and an adorable little happy trail, one that he could teasingly see peaking out of his tight leather pants. Pants, that just further accentuated his nice ass, that flowed into lean muscled legs that lead to nice toned calves. Leon was a very sexy man, Cloud could admit.

And besides his nice body, Leon also has very handsome facial features; silver grey eyes, a well defined jaw line, the scar that ran across the bridge of his nose, just further added to his dangerous sex appeal. Cloud could not help but be attracted to him, any one that likes guys would be, and he definitely didn't feel attracted to only girls, his past relationship with Zack proved it. He would admit, he was immensely attracted to Squall Leonheart.

The thought scared him though, he hasn't felt that way about anybody in a very long time, the most recent being Aerith. And he never really felt sexually attracted to her to begin with, now that he had the time to think back on it. He had sex with her once, about two weeks before Sephiroth killed her at the Forgotten Capital. He was exceptionally genital with her, he had to be because of all the Mako and God knows what else he had in him. One wrong move and he could have really hurt her, killed her even. There was also the fact that only bad things ever happen to anybody that has ever gotten involved with him; Zack, Aerith, Tifa, his mother, his whole village, the baby.

Yes, that's right he got Aerith pregnant, one time was all it took. They thought he was sterile because of a side effect of the Mako and all the experiments done on him by Hojo. They didn't take in account that because Aerith is an Ancient she has a very high tolerance to Mako and the lifestream. He found out about a week after their first time, they were going to settle down and raise the baby after everything was finally done. But everybody knows how that ended.

He was devastated afterwards, not only did he loose Zack, his first love, but another person he cared deeply about, and his unborn child too. Nobody but Vincent ever found out about the baby, and that was because of him sharing his body with Chaos. After the whole fiasco at the coliseum and he found out that Aerith was given a second chance by the planet, he was so happy that words couldn't even describe how he felt. Though he wished their baby was given the same chance, but the planet could only do so much given the circumstances.

After their heartfelt reunion they both decided that they were better off just being friends, that from the beginning their love was the type you would have for a sibling. That things just wouldn't work out between them, that too many bad things have happened for them to truly be happy with each other. Besides, his heart couldn't take another blow like that, then there would really be no hope of him ever piecing it back together, if there wasn't already.

There was also the fact that he might not survive the battle with Sephiroth. And he couldn't just not fight him, the Geostigma made sure of that. That there was no hope of surviving unless he went into battle, that there was no easy way out. And he vowed to never put another person though something like that again- Cloud was again brought out of his morbid thoughts by Leon calling his name.

* * *

They worked in silence, so that gave Leon another opportunity to further study Cloud. The first thing that he took notice of was the other's eyes. He could tell that whatever Cloud was thinking about really disturbed him. The thing about Cloud was, that if you payed enough attention you could read his emotions though them. That just made Leon think about a saying he heard once, that your eyes are the mirror to your soul. And Leon agreed, that it was indeed, the case with Cloud. His eyes always had that haunted look to them, but it seemed even more intense today, making it seem like Cloud has lost all hope. That he has seen way too many things, things that nobody should have too witness.

It brought a protective feeling over Leon, more intense then anything he has ever felt towards anybody. It also made him realize that he did indeed care for the beautiful blond swordsman, though he didn't know the extent of those feelings. He knew that he cared about Cloud like you would a comrade, they are partners after all, in the battlefield and on the Restoration Committee. That alone gave him a reason to care, plus he new that he could trust Cloud with his life, and he hoped that other thought the same.

Leon doesn't know why he never really took the time to study Cloud before now, why he used to think that the he was just arrogant. Why he thought that the way Cloud was always so short with people, never letting them get too close, that he just didn't care. The way he also seemed to always brush off everybody's concern like they weren't worth his time didn't help things either. He also doesn't know how he never noticed before, how Cloud was always looking out for everybody, in a secretive kind of way. How you didn't know, but he was always there if you were in need, in all likeness to a Guardian Angel.

But now that he took the time to really look, he knew that wasn't the case, that Cloud, was indeed a good person. Though, he didn't know why Cloud would always try to purposely push people away, it confused him. Now, he wasn't the most sociable person either, but he always took other's concern for him into consideration. And would try to ease their fears. It also helped Leon make the decision to get to know Cloud better. And to find out someday, the reason why Cloud keeps everybody at arms length. Why Aerith is the only one he lets get close. He then decided to start by trying to take Cloud's mind off whatever he was thinking about, by luring him into conversation.

* * *

Everything started by the calling of a name, then blue met silver. At the time they didn't know what the utterance of a simple name would bring about, that it would change everything. And make them feel things that they didn't think possible.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello, this is my first Kingdom Hearts story, so please leave comments. I will also welcome new ideas. The characters also belong to their creators, I don't own them!**

* * *

Cloud heard Leon calling him, he was wondering why the brunet was calling him by his first name. He didn't mind, it's just that Leon always called him by his last name, Strife. He didn't know why that was the case, when Leon called everybody else by their first name. But he just assumed that it was because he didn't like him very much. He knew that his attitude bothered him, the way it seemed he was always brushing off everybody's concern. But no matter what Leon thought, he didn't do it for the reasons he knew the other was thinking. That he didn't care, no it was the opposite, it was because he did care. It was to protect them, even though he knew they are more then capable of protecting themselves.

But, he also did it for cowardly reasons too, because he was afraid of getting close to people. That they always leave him in the end, either by death or by choice, once they find out what he is, so its better to save himself the heart ache. Besides, he knew Leon wouldn't understand what its like to be so tired of everything. Tired of trying to be accepted, of fighting, of protecting everybody. It is just too much for him, most of the time it seemed like he was fighting a loosing battle. He just wanted to rest, to be at peace. Something he knew he would never have, not anymore, anyway.

Making contact with Leon's silver eyes, Cloud took notice of his facial expression. It was full of concern, it was also the most emotion he ever seen Leon show towards him. It made his dormant heart feel again; feel cared for, protected, important, accepted, and dare he say loved? It also made him remember. Remember the simpler times, when Zack was still alive and he was the one being protected. When Zack and himself carelessly passed the days just being in love and doing what Shin-Ra told them. When he believed they were going to, one day peacefully live out the rest of their days growing old together. When he was still naive and didn't know the true horrors that humankind was capable of committing. When he wanted to be a hero, that life was like the fairy tails. That the good guy always wins and gets the happy ending.

Well, he became a hero all right, but at what price; Zack, his mom, his baby, his humanity, and he certainly got no happy ending. He learned that life doesn't work like that the hard way, though experience. He has also seen way too many things, horrors that will always be haunting him in the back of his mind, and it broke him in the process. There is no going back, he can't forget, and he doesn't think he has it in him to try and love again. To share himself and risk being rejected, to try and get somebody to understand. He has given that up, Aerith was the last, it's also something he accepted.

When he lost Zack, and himself in the process, that was when he met Aerith. He was immediately drawn to her, she felt familiar, safe. And he knew he couldn't leave her, at the time he didn't know why. As time passed they grew closer, he thought that she was the one. But then he remembered, learned that his memories were a combination of his and Zack's. That he forgot because going on without him was too much, that's when he realized that the love he felt for Aerith was not the same kind he shared with Zack. He was going to stay with her though, she was going to be the only exception, and the only reason was because Zack loved her too. It was something they both came to terms with, that they could never be with normal people. That normal people would never understand the trails they wen't though. The thought saddened him, making him feel alienated in the process.

All the pieces fell into place then; why his memories were so vague, why he constantly got the feeling of deja-vu, why Tifa seemed to know him, and why he was so drawn to Aerith and just knew he had to protect her. The only good thing was that he got out of it was being able to see the past though Zack's eyes, feel his emotions, the love he felt for him. Why Zack so willingly gave up his life so he could live. That Zack didn't want him to blame himself, but that didn't change the fact that he did. How could he not? If he was just stronger, more reliable, there were so many 'if's', so many things he wished he could change- He was again, brought out of his self destructive thoughts by Leon, "Are you alright, Cloud?"

* * *

After deciding to lure Cloud into conversation, Leon decided the best way to start was to start by asking if he was ok. He could tell that the other was in need of somebody to talk to, he looked so dejected, so beaten. It pulled at Leon's heart strings. After Cloud registered the question he made eye contact with him. And Leon was blown away by the raw emotion he saw in his mysterious blue eyes; the pain, the hopelessness, and the... acceptance? Acceptance of what? What could have possibly happened to Cloud that was so terrible? Everybody here at Radiant Garden has lost something important, himself included. The thought baffled Leon, making him more curious.

Acting on whim Leon moved to grasp Cloud by his shoulder, with his for once, ungloved hand. He was immediately aware of how soft Cloud's skin was, which was odd for a warrior, who spent a lot of time out in the elements. His body was taken over by instinct, why he felt compelled to move closer to him, so close that their chest's were touching, Leon didn't know. He just knew it felt so right, the way that Cloud melded so perfectly to his body, the way his breath felt on his lips. It stirred his emotions, his desire for the other man. He never felt anything like it- for anybody.

He was suddenly aware of the heat spreading down to his hot needy cock. He tried to remember the last time he had a good fuck, really got to let loose. He would meet up with some random woman in some bar in another world- when he had a chance to slip away unnoticed. He was a man after all, had needs that needed to be taken care of, and it has really been awhile, weeks, a month? He couldn't remember, not with the way Cloud was rubbing up against him, against his unclothed chest, particularly his hardened nipples. Making the burning heat in his groin more intense.

It was too much, he had to stop- before he crossed boundaries that he knew he shouldn't. It would change everything he thought he knew about himself, he wasn't ready for that. Gathering all the self control he could muster, something that was no easy task, Leon slowly slid his hand off Cloud's shoulder. Stepped back a few steps Leon still stared into Cloud's breathtaking blue eyes, letting him know he was still waiting an answer to his previously asked question.

Cloud continued to look at him, and Leon could tell he hesitated before answering, "Yeah, Leon I'm fine... Just thinking about things." deciding to let Cloud know he was there if needed, Leon then answered "Well, I'm here if you need to talk." And he really was, and he hoped that someday Cloud would trust him enough to confide in him. Cloud continued looking him in the eyes for a few seconds, trying to judge the sincerity of his words. Seeming to find what he was looking for, Cloud then cautiously answered "Ok, Leon." With that they went back to work fixing the water way, but that didn't stop Leon from worrying and trying to put together the pieces of the puzzle that has, just recently piqued his interest.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello**,** this is my first Kingdom Hearts story, so please leave comments. I will also welcome new ideas. The characters also belong to their creators, I don't own them! I have also added paragraphs to the story and have changed things to make it flow better. So you might want to reread chapters 1-4. And thanks for reading!**

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_I woke to a loud explosion and my body being flung thought the air, I knew then that something was terribly wrong. Then I suddenly got a sinking feeling in my gut as I remembered the horrid feeling I got earlier, and I just knew that Shin-Ra found us. Trying to forget the pain of hitting the steel wall of the truck I tried to find Zack. Once I did I __hurriedly made my way to him. Noticing his demeanor, I could tell he was ready for battle, and I then knew he reached the same conclusion. Once I reached him I grasped his arm "Zack, I-"_

_I didn't even get to finish my sentence before I was pulled into Zack's protective embrace, I could tell he was trying to reassure me that everything was going to be fine. I just knew that it wasn't, and that he knew the same. Besides, I now knew that things are never easy, at least not in dealing with Shin-Ra. "Cloud there is a rock over to my left, I want you to go hide behind it." I could not believe what I was hearing, that Zack wanted me to abandon him, to let him fight this battle alone, I had to reason with him. "Z-Zack, there is no way you will be able to fight them alone! There is a whole army out there!" I was crying now, I couldn't help it, everything was too much, it wasn't fair. Nothing in the past four years has been fair, the things they did to us-_

_"Just do it, Cloud!" The of force of the command made me realize that there was no reasoning with him, it was the first time Zack has ever yelled at me. Yeah, he has yelled before, but never at me, never when he wasn't serious. The tears were falling harder now and I felt Zack brush them away with his thumb. "I love you so much, Cloud." __I brought my eyes to his, God I couldn't believe this was the last time I might ever see him. Caught up in the moment I grabbed the color of his shirt and pulled him down for a needy kiss, putting all the feeling I could muster into it; the love, the adoration, all the good things I felt about this brave man, the love of my life. And Zack did the same, I could feel his need for me to survive, how much he loves me. When we broke apart our eyes met, "I love you too, I need you Zack!" He gave me a sad smile "On the count of three, run behind the rock and stay there. Don't come out until they are gone, no matter what!"_

_I was running, running faster then I have ever ran before. The sound of gun shots and battle echoed though the air, leaving behind a putrid stench of blood and carnage. But my body was on autopilot, barley taking notice of anything else, trying to desperately carry out the order Zack had given me. I was almost to the rock when I slipped and fell into the mud. I was so tired, ready to just quit, but the thought of disappointing Zack spurred me on. Gathering all the energy I had left I crawled to the rock and just collapsed, my tiredness finally catching up to me. I could still hear the battle carrying on; the gunshots, feel the chill of the dreary September winds, the freezing rain splattering on my skin, skin that was caked with mud. I could not help but think that the weather morbidly suited the violent circumstances that I found myself in. I had to keep myself from going back to help Zack, knowing that he wanted me to stay safe. I felt so powerless, not being able to do anything but wait. So I decided to pray, pray that Zack would live to any higher being that would listen. All I had left to do now was wait, and try to keep believing._

_I don't think time has ever seemed to pass so slowly before, the anticipation of waiting for the battle to end was readily eating away at my hypersensitive nerves. The wait seemed to go on for ever, till the only thing I could hear was the steady sound of rain falling. When I was finally sure that it was safe to come out, that's when I realized that Zack never came back to me, that he must be hurt. I was still so weak I was only able to crawl out from behind the rock. But I was not prepared for the gruesome image that awaited me. There was so much blood, more then you would think the human body was capable of carrying. It mixed with the muddy soil, creating a disturbing murky color that all just clumped together. Then the putrid stench reached my nose and I threw up so many time that I lost count. _

_When my stomach finally settled, that's when I saw Zack, he was just laying there. The need to get to him was so strong that I was running on pure adrenalin to get to him. The distance seemed like a journey that took weeks to complete, but I got there. I could tell he was gravely injured, God I was crying again, it seemed that was all I was capable of these days. "Z-Zack, God, please, please answer me!" I pulled myself up so I could caress his face with my hand, my tears landing on his eye lids. Then I suddenly heard a loud cough and a pain filled voice, "Spikey, you got to listen to me, don't cry." I chocked on a strained sob, trying to listen to what Zack was saying "I don't have much longer left, Cloud, but you got to go on. Live for the both of us, you're my living legacy, the proof that I lived." I was down right sobbing now, so much that I could barely breath, "Z-Zack, Don't leave me, I love you, I need you!" He gave me a sad smile that made my heart break into pieces, before he reached up to pull me down for one last kiss. smearing blood all over my face. " I love you too, Cloud, more then you could imagine. Take the Buster Sword and run, don't look back...'' _

_Then his arm fell back to the ground and everything got quiet, and I just knew that he passed away. Why God, why did you let him die, I prayed to you. And this is how you re payed me. I couldn't take it anymore, so I just screamed, louder then I have ever before, I was sure that if anybody was around to hear it, they would go deaf from the intensity of it. __Once I was done mourning I gathered what little strength I had left to pick up the Buster Sword, to continue forward, leaving Zack's body were he so honorably died defending me. Though I knew that things would never be the same again, that I would never be the same again._

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Cloud woke with a muffled sob, there were tears running down his cheeks, and a sheen of sweat covering his body. The muggy August night making everything more intense. He decided to go ahead and take a shower, there was no way he would be able to go back to sleep, not after that dream. This always happened near the anniversary of Zack's death, he would always be more absent minded, seeming to be caught in a realm between the real world and his memories. He would be like that till after the end of September, early October. But that was fine with him, it was the least he could to to honor Zack's memory.

Once he was in the shower Cloud started to remember yesterdays events. Leon and himself fixing the water way, the chemistry between them. The way Leon's hands felt on him, how their body's fit so perfectly together, stirring his so thought, dormant desire. Himself wanting to have sex for the first time in five years, has it really been so long since Zack passed away? God he was already twenty three, he was nowhere near the same as he was when he was still fifteen, still young and trying find himself. But enough about that, what did he do after they got the water way fixed? Oh yeah, he helped Aerith in her garden till diner time, ate, and then retired to his room and passed out. Deciding he was clean enough he got out of the shower and proceeded to get dressed. After he was in his usual attire he decided to get a glass of water for his parched throat. Maybe remember the happier times he shared with Zack, and with that he proceeded to the kitchen.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello**,** this is my first Kingdom Hearts story, so please leave comments. I will also welcome new ideas. The characters also belong to their creators, I don't own them!**

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Walking down to the kitchen Cloud pondered the days of his youth, when he was still young and barely into his teenage years. When he allowed himself to be lured into joining Shin-Ra. When he was blinded by the propaganda, the prestige, the glamour, the promise of heroism, things every teenage boy could dream of. God, he was such a fool, he did have to give it to Shin-Ra, though. They did have great advertising, they had only the best after all, Sephiroth, his childhood hero, the person who he aspired to be like, who he looked up to. But, enough about _him_, he didn't even want to think about Sephiroth. The living reminder of his inhumanity, his darkness, of what he failed at and things better left unknown. Things he will never be able to forget, because as long as he is still alive there will never be a chance to, he will be in every dark corner of his mind mocking him- NO! This was not the time to be remembering him, this was Zack's time. The time of year he mourned the man who loved him with everything he had, who made a everlasting impression on the way he would live his life. The very reason he was sill alive, his hero.

When Cloud finally made it into the kitchen, he grabbed a cup and started to fill it with water from the pitcher, that was when he noticed that the moon was still out. Checking the clock he noted that it was only 4 am, he still had a few hours before he would have to worry about anybody getting up. So he decided to enjoy the moon, letting its pale light wash over is features, letting it make him remember the first time he met Zack. It was on the mission to Modeoheim, to track down the AWOL Genesis, when Tseng crashed the helicopter into the mountain. When Zack and himself got separated from the group. It was night time then too, and the moon was even more beautiful then. He still remembered it like yesterday, Zack saved him then too. If Zack wouldn't have caught him, he would have died from the impact.

_I was in a helicopter on the way to Modeoheim, to track down the Crimson Commander, the whole trip not helping my motion sickness. They say he just wen't crazy, stole a bunch of stuff, and disappeared, taking his childhood friend and lover, Angeal Hewley, with him. But I couldn't help but think they weren't telling the whole story, I didn't know why, I never knew them personally. I was just a grunt that failed his SOLIDER exam after all. For all I knew, they could really be bad people, but ever since I was young I always had this sixth sense, like there was some force trying to guide me. It was part of the reason why I was such an out cast back home. The whole village having such old traditions didn't help either, my mother getting pregnant out of wedlock made her an outcast, made her looked down upon. She never really talked about my father, all she ever told me was that he was young, handsome, and something different. That she fell in love with him in the short amount of time he was there, and gave him her everything. That one day he just up and left, never saying good bye and to never be seen again. It was something I never asked about again, I couldn't bring my self to, seeing how sad it made her. But that never stopped her from loving me- _

_Suddenly __there was a loud explosion and people saying we had to jump, that the chopper was attacked. And I couldn't help but curse Shin-Ra for being cheap bastards and not providing parachutes, if only for the unenhanced. Then __I was falling, so I closed my eyes and waited for the fatal blow, but it never came. Then I heard a masculine laugh "Man, I know I'm hot, but now I even have angels fallin' for me?" _

_Startled, I flung myself back, falling into the freezing snow, the sound of laughter still echoing in my ears. Looking up I took in the appearance of the one that broke my fall. And I couldn't stop the massive blush that heated up my face, thanking God, that my face was already frostbitten. This man was different then anyone I have ever seen before, and I could tell he had to come from some place with a tropical climate because of his __exotic appearance; from his __flawless tan skin, to his vibrant violet eyes, to __his raven black hair, that was spiky like my own, but just a little more tame.__ The only word that I could think of to describe him was beautiful. And I just knew I would be safe with him._

_I was brought out of my daze by a strong hand coming into view "Well, are you just going to sit there and admire my roguishly good looks all day- not that I mind of course, but I have to say you must be gettin' cold just sittin' there in all that snow. It bein' dark out can't be helpin' either." Embarrassed that I was caught checking him out I __hurriedly took his hand, taking notice to how different it was to mine. Where mine was petite, just now starting to develop calluses, his were larger, stronger. They were also a little rough, leaving a tickling sensation on my skin, making heat spread to my lower regions. It was the first time I ever felt anything like it._

_Next thing I knew I was pulled to his chest, feeling strong arms circle around me. Making me take notice of his scent, he smelled so good. Like a tropical storm, dangerous but calming at the same time. Then I heard him laughing again "Man, kiddo, you're just like a new born chocobo! You even have the same hair!" Angry at being embarrassed again, I shouted "My hair is not like a chocobo's!" He was out right cackling now, and after finally calming down he released me from his embrace, leaving me feeling cold, empty. "Ok, ok, kiddo. If you don't want me callin' you chocobo the whole time, tell me your name. Mine's Zack Fair, SOLIDER First Class, at your service!" Blushing and berating myself for disrespecting my superior officer, I meekly answered "Strife, Cloud Strife, Sir."_

_He then got a constipated look on his face "Aww man, don't go callin' me sir, it makes me feel old. Just call me Zack, you don't mind me callin' you Cloud, right?" I was shocked at how carefree he was for him being above me in rank, they usually looked down on us grunts. But looking at his face I could tell he was being sincere so I hesitantly answered "Yeah, I don't mind, Si- I mean Zack!" Then he suddenly broke out in a big grin, showing me his pearly white teeth. Making my heart race, and I was instantly captivated by him. I just knew I had to get to know him, he made me feel excited, like fate brought us together. And I was being compelled to do so by that invisible force, it was always there guiding me, though at the time I didn't know why. He was still smiling when he said, "Well, come on! lets go find the others!"_

_So we started our trek though the snow, the moons pale light the only thing lighting the way. The moon was so beautiful, making the beautiful snow covered forest look magically enchanted. We spent that time getting to know each other, from our favorite animal to our favorite music, then the topic of home came up. "So Cloud, where are you from?" The question caught me off guard, home not being a subject I was comfortable with. But I felt that I would be safe telling Zack, it wasn't like we were going into detail after all "I'm from N__ibelheim, it's a village up in the mountains, it's a reactor town." Then he started laughing again "I've never heard of it, must be a real back water place!" Feeling a little frisky, I asked "Oh, yeah, well, where are you from?" Still chuckling, he proudly answered "Me, I'm from Gongaga!" Then I broke out into a rambunctious laughter, making Zack blush. "And you have the nerve to make fun of where I live! You are as much of a country boy as I am!"__ He got a sheepish look on his face before saying "Yeah, well I'll admit, Gongaga has a reactor too." Then we suddenly looked each other in the eyes, already knowing were this was going. Zack suddenly got a mischievous grin on his face before saying "The thing about living in a reactor town-" Then next thing I knew I also had a big smile on my face,finding myself finishing Zack's sentence "There is nothing else out there!"_

_We were both laughing so hard that our eyes were watering, then Zack pulled me into a one armed hug, grinning down at me "You're all right kiddo!" Smiling up at him, I answered in a country boy accent "Well, you're not too bad your self!" Making Zack laugh even harder, and when the laughter settled down we continued making our way back to the rest of the group, falling into a comfortable silence. The sun was just starting to rise over the horizon when we found Tseng, it washing us over in a warm feeling. Then Zack said "When we get back to Shin-Ra I'll look you up!" Blushing I answered "Yeah, I would like that." Then we made our way over to Tseng, a smile on both of our faces. I fell in love that day, I just didn't know it till later. _

When Cloud was done reminiscing he noticed that he was crying again, his tears glowing under the moon light. He was clutching his glass so tight that his knuckles were white. He tried to control his sobbing, but with little luck. "Oh, God, why does it still hurt so much! Will it ever get better?" He was in so much pain, he knew he was worrying Aerith. He knew she knew why, but he couldn't stop, then suddenly the glass shattered, cutting his hands, blood dripping down onto the floor along with his tears. Then he heard foot steps approaching.

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Leon was woken by loud noises coming from down stairs, so he hurriedly grabbed his Gunblade and tried to find the source, cursing that he might have to do battle and he was in nothing but is silken pajama bottoms. As he stealthily made his way down the the steps he noted that it was coming from the kitchen, so he got closer, so he would be able to see what was going on but they wouldn't be able to see him. That was when he saw it was just Cloud, the tension fading, his shoulders going slack. Then that was when he noticed the moon light made Cloud seem otherworldly "_Fucking Hell, there he was letting Cloud's appearance lure him in again, he only liked women, right?"_

He was brought out of his thoughts when he heard Cloud sob "Oh, God, why does it still hurt so much! Will it ever get better?" That was when he noticed the tears, was Cloud in pain? He was shocked still, never before seeing the formidable man so vulnerable before. It made his heart hurt, made him feel sick, made him remember the first time he ever laid eyes on the Blond. It was a year ago at the Coliseum, when Radiant Garden was still known as Hallow Bastion.

_He was watching the other matches, himself not having to fight since he passed the first round of the tournament. That was when the next opponents came into view, the first one being a big muscular guy with an ax as a weapon, nothing really standing out about him. Then that was when he noticed the other, the first thing standing out about him was how small he was compared to his opponent. Then it was the golden blond hair, hair that stood out even more in contrast to his all black wardrobe. It was not too long, but not short either, the next thing he saw shocked him though. It was the blonds choice of a weapon, it was a humongous sword that was even bigger then he was. He didn't know how he was even able to lift it, let alone if he would be able to use it properly. But if he thought that was shocking, it was nothing compared to the battle. The blond blocked every blow his opponent threw at him, then he went on the offensive. The blonds opponent not even being able to block a single hit, then next thing he knew the match was over, the blond had won. Then that was when they made eye contact, himself in awe of the blueness of the other's eyes. They were the most beautiful blue he has ever seen, rivaling the most beautiful sapphires- _

Leon was shocked out of his memories by a loud crash, looking up he saw that the glass Cloud was holding broke, cutting his hands. Acting on instinct Leon made his way over to the blond, trying to look like he wasn't worried, when really he was. He then gently put his hand on Cloud's shoulder "Cloud, let me see your hands." He could tell he startled him by how the blonds body tensed up. Then Cloud turned around giving Leon a clear view of his tearful gems, making his heart clench and excited all at the same time. "Come on Cloud, sit in a chair while I get the first aid kit." Surprisingly, the blond listened, giving Leon a minute to grab a first aid kit out of a nearby cabinet, while for once being grateful that Yuffie was such a klutz, making the idea of not having bandages in a room with many sharp objects ludicrous.

Once he finished patching up Cloud's hands, while kneeling in front of him, Leon worriedly asked "Why were you crying?" He could tell that the blond was shocked, if the fearful look on his face was anything to go by. But, then it was his turn to be shocked because the blond started sobbing again. "I... M-my heart hurts, L-Leon... I, he, Z-Zack" And Cloud stopped there, not being able to get anything else out over the sobbing. And Leon just didn't know what to say to that, so he did the only thing that made sense and embraced the angelic blond, pulling him into his lap on the floor. He thought that Cloud would push him away, but of course this just proved that things haven't been normal recently because the blond returned the embrace, laying his head on Leon's shoulder, while clutching at his bare back.

Leon held the blond for hours it seemed, till Cloud cried himself to sleep, leaving a trail of tears running down his back. He just couldn't believe how right Cloud felt in his arms, how he never noticed how fragile the blond really was, how good he smelled. He smelt so fresh, so pure, like a snowy mountain and a little bit of pine. It had a calming effect on Leon, he didn't want to let him go. But the sun was starting to rise, meaning that Aerith was going to be up soon. So he went to put the Cloud back in his bed, deciding to just leave him in the clothes he had on, not wanting to have to explain how he would have gotten back into his pajamas. Once he was sure that the blond was comfortable enough, he made his way back to the kitchen to wait for Aerith. He needed answers, and she was the person to go to. But that didn't stop Leon from wondering who exactly Zack was, and why did had such an effect on the seemingly stoic Cloud Strife?

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**Things are going to really start developing between Cloud and Leon now. I just wanted to let you know more about Zack's relationship with Cloud, there is probably going to be about one more flash back. I was also trying to decided if I should dedicate a chapter to Zack, it would be about how he got to know Cloud from his point of view. But I wouldn't be posting it till later into the story, so let me know if I should. You can let me know though the reviews. Thanks for reading!**


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